Monday, March 19, 2012
Incredibly Close Call
"Jason", if you ever stumble across this blog, please don't judge me before you talk to me in person about it. Don't think that I do this to expose you or anyone at all. I do it to tell my story to hundreds of other regular readers who struggle with similar situations. Some things aren't exactly as they happened, mainly for the purpose of keeping both you and I anonymous online.
If you don't see this, thank you. I am very lucky that you didn't discover my only secret from you.
I'm in a very emotionally confused state today. Jason seemed very upset last night after I got back from my date with David. And I think it's my fault...
I really need to get things figured out in my own head before I go messing with someone else. Last night I saw that he was upset so I began rubbing his back and neck, then eventually stroking his cheek. I like comforting him. But I probably took it farther than a friendship level.
I had been doing stuff like this before, but this time it hit me hard because just a few hours before I was in my bed with David having the same thing done to me (and much more of course). Maybe the whole top/bottom thing is hindering me from being able to decide.
I REALLY like when David does stuff to me. Last night he started tickling me and ended up on top of me and began intensely making out with me. Even though I consider myself a leader, I like being played with and in a way "dominated". No, I'm not talking about anal sex. Never done that before so I wouldn't know.
BUT, I also really like being the caring type of person towards Jason. I like rubbing his back and just caressing him and holding him close to me.
Jason has great looks, a great personality, but has me confused with his emotions towards me.
David has okay looks, a bit of an annoying personality, but really expresses that he loves me.
Which is the better choice?
Posted by Tristan Skyler at 12:34 PM