Sunday, December 4, 2011

Blowing in the Wind

Ok, so I know I haven't updated in a long time but this is partly due to the fact that I had Thanksgiving Break last weekend so not much happened other than shopping with Mikey which was really fun. I will just give a quick overview of what happened tonight.

I will skip the details, but basicaly after a three day build up with Jason, I experienced my first blowjob session. Giving him one was the easy part. I actually think I did a really good job at it. No, I didn't swallow. Mainly because I was scared I would gag and embarass myself, but he didn't seem to mind.

We went back to cuddling and after a while I told him I was ready whenever he was. I told him that this was the part I was most nervous about. He undid my pants for me and pulled them and my boxers down. Luckily I was able to be hard throughout the nervousness. He began sucking almost immediately. The first thing I felt was the warmth, and the feeling of his lips that I had felt during our kisses. I was telling myself to not cum too early because I wanted to give it time. After about 3 minutes, I was getting worried. I wasn't nearing an orgasm at all, and my penis was beginning to feel numb from all the motion. I told him maybe he should just try jacking me off for a while, which he did. But still I just wasn't feeling turned on. I can only compare it to the feeling of trying to masturbate once you have just cummed from masturbating. It's like I had no sexual drive at all. Which is crazy because I did when I was blowing him. After about 6 minutes I told him I'd try myself and then let him take over when I got close. So I began to masturbate while he watched. It still felt numb. I got to a point where I felt that with a few more strokes I would cum so I let him take over. But I lost that feeling once it got back in his mouth. After 10 minutes I just told him to forget it.

I don't know what's wrong with me. I've never had a problem with orgasming before. In my bedroom I can cum after like 2 minutes if I was in a rush. Maybe I was just too nervous, or maybe he just wasn't going fast enough. I didn't want to make him go too fast though. I'm not even sure if that would have helped. I even tried to think of Mikey while he was doing it but that didn't last long because I felt bad about it. I was so embarrassed after. He told me it was fine and he faked his first orgasm while with his ex. But I still don't know if that was true or he was just trying to make me feel better. But no matter how okay he was with it, I still felt like I let myself down.

Is this normal? Do guys normally have trouble cumming their first time? Would it have been better if we started with handjobs and not blowjobs? Tell me your stories and let me know if I'm alone or not in this.



  1. Yes, its normal. If you over-think it, it can be hard to have an orgasm. You have to get over your nervousness. If you like the guy, then just let go and allow yourself to enjoy it.

    Also, if you masturbate too much it can be hard to cum because your body is too used to how you do it. So lay off for awhile so your body reacts more naturally to your mate.

    This is good advice so I hope you take it. You have a nice relationship going so you just need to let go and enjoy it.

    Plus stop glossing over the Mikey stuff. Do you still like him? What's the scoop?

  2. What happened is normal. Just relax, I was nervous as hell my first time and it took a little work. The person I was with though understood because I told him I was nervous. If you both are into each other he will understand that from you just fine the next time around and he might do better for you if you just tell him what you want him to do or how you want him to do it. He is likely just as nervous as you. People just respond differently in different situations. If he's getting you off it should be about how it makes YOU feel... same for him, you should be doing it to him in the way that makes it best for him. The only way to accomplish that is by talking to each other and going one step at a time.

    Agree with first poster, try either holding off on masturbating for a bit or try some techniques that you don't normally do to yourself to get a better feel on what it's like to be stimulated in other ways. Your body gets used to getting off in certain ways because you've spent years perfecting them. It's not going to respond as quickly to new situations. That's just how it works. If you don't use lube, you should try it for a while and see how your body responds. Pretty easy to simulate a BJ using lube and your hands. Good luck... I enjoy your blog.