Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Most Erotic Moment of My Life

Until then anyways...

(Stole that quote from Titanic, but that's okay because it's true.)

Sunday, we all met early to film for our next video. I picked Mikey up at 9:50 and then we went to Walmart to shop for props. I made a special trip to McDonald's afterwards so he could get something to eat. Then we met at our friends' house to film. In this video, there was going to be one scene where they were all in tighty-whiteys, so we bought little kids' superhero briefs for all 5 of them. These guys are all ages 14-15, so it would be a tight fit.

When we got there, they were all excited to try them on, especially Mikey. They all went to corners of the room to change, while I waited on one of their beds, trying my hardest not to peak at any of them. I didn't want to make things awkward. When they got them on they actually said they liked them and wanted to keep them on. Not gonna lie, 2 of the 4 wearing them were HOTT (Mikey and Justin). Justin is 15, but he looks about 13. He isn't that attractive in the face but he has a FINE body. Anyways, I enjoyed seeing Mikey in them the most. He was a bit more pudgy than I imagines, but it didn't bother me. I was hoping to see the outline of his dick in the briefs but all I could see was a bulge, although he did show his pubes a lot in the beginning.

Once we started filming, they decided that they wanted to do the entire video in them. Obviously I had no opposition to this. All went great, and I managed to control my...desires better than I thought I could.Justin kept flashing his ball sack out of the side of his briefs, but that's all I managed to see from him. Although you could see the outline of his dick in them. It was small, but cute.

Then as we were thinking of ideas... I suggested one of them running naked away from their "mom" who was trying to dress them. They loved the idea. And guess who was first to volunteer to do it? Yep... Mikey. I was totally surprised by this, with him knowing that I was gay AND that I liked him. So... it happened. He and one of the other guys stripped all the way down to do the scene. The other guy had a nice dick but I don't find him attractive any other way. But Mikey... although it was hard to see his dick because of all the pubes, it was an instant turn on for me. I actually regret that I didn't look more. I kept trying not to stare because I didn't want him to get weirded out. So we filmed the scene... 7 times because it didn't "look right" according to me lol. After watching the footage I got to see it more but honestly it isn't as exciting as it was seeing in person. There was also a bubble bath scene with Mikey but it wasn't as exciting after I had already seen everything. Oh, and what was even more interesting was that after we finished filming he decided to change back into his regular underwear right in front of me, so I saw everything, again.

I hated that it had to end, but sadly, it did. I took Mikey home, but we didn't talk much because I let him play Angry Birds on my phone. When I got back to my house and got on Facebook to an IM from him.

"i know ur beating ur meat to my dick"
"nahh, it's not the same on video as seeing it in person"
"still...don't show that to anyone else"
"i won't. I hope I acted straight enough today"
"hmm, idk about that"
"Well its hard not to act gay when you have a bunch of guys naked and in their underwear"
"i know"

Anyways, that was about it for my big adventure. It really was something I will remember forever.

It's crazy thinking that back in December of last year I was just hoping I would get a chance to talk to him when he was selling tickets for one of our plays. And now I'm watching hims strip naked and run towards me (err.. the camera). It's incredible.

Oh and in more recent news, he texted me to come to his school after school today so we could film something. So I brought all my stuff and got there. We talked about the video... ended up watching YouTube videos.... and just talking in general. We didn't shoot anything. But of course, I didn't mind because I enjoy spending alone time with him. At one point he turned the laptop towards him and I climbed over him to see it. It was the most I had ever touched him, and he didn't seem to mind. He even kept it turned that way so I had to lean over him to see it.

Do I think he's gay? No. But curious? Most definitely. Why else would he be so willing to do all this stuff with me?

I love him, am I wrong for that?


Saturday, May 28, 2011

A Boy of Summer

Yes, stole the title from an article referred to me by a commenter. Thanks! I haven't had a chance to read over everything but it seems really interesting. Thanks for taking the time to comment B. Dix :)

So the summer has begun for me since I am a senior and I get out a few weeks ahead of everyone else. Oh, and yes I have turned 18 recently so I will update that as well. I'm going to address a few things in this entry but I'll start with the normal and give you a Mikey update.

I'm still working with him in the video group. It has allowed us to get to know each other very well and I'm happy that our friendship can continue throughout the summer. I even got him to sign my yearbook:

Haha, just thought I would share that. I have thought about going to his picture in it and highlighting his name or something to remind myself in the future of him. Not like I could ever forget.

The mood that he was in according to the last entry was gone the next day, and so was mine. He was back to his usual self.

He mentioned last week that I was "too cool to be gay". At the time I wasn't too sure what he meant by that, but now I know he was just saying I don't act "gay". This carried on into yesterday.

Thursday night he was asking me how to make a YouTube background for our channel, so I tried my best to help him out through texts, which didn't work very well. He ended up getting frustrated and asked if I could come over tomorrow (Friday) to help him with it. I obviously said yes. Me, him, alone at his house.... HELLO??

So I got to school about 10 minutes before it let out and he was already waiting for me to pick him up. It was pouring down raining and he was soaked. When he got in the car he stared at me, smiling, with water running down his face. It was the cutest thing ever. Anyways, we talked about his day on the way to his house, then used team effort to get all of his stuff out of my car and inside without getting very wet. Then we stood outside for like 3 minutes while he tried unlocking the door with a bent key. Normally I would be mad about getting soaked but it was worth it just to hear his laugh the whole time.

When we got inside we took our shoes off and went into his room to put his stuff up and get the laptop. Then we began working on the background. After that, we watched a few YouTube videos and then he said to me...

"You're not gay."

At first I was a little embarrassed that he brought this up (remember, I'm not totally out about it and don't usually talk about it much in person). Anyways, I asked why, and he went on to say "You don't act gay, I think you're making it up". He said all this in joking of course, but I wanted to keep it going so I said "prove that I'm not gay". He paused for a second, then said "I know how you can prove it... wait... nevermind.... it will make me sound gay if I say it". Too late, I had to know now. So I kept bugging him about it, causing him to turn red and bury his head in his arms. I then told him to type it in the computer while I looked away, so he did.

"Get a guy to stand in your room butt naked for 24 hours and you won't get a woodie"

Okay, I gotta admit that I was a little disappointed. I was hoping for something along the lines of  "pull out your dick and i'll pull out mine and you won't get a woodie". But oh well, so I responded:

"You would lose that bet, and unless the guy was over 20, it would happen in less than 10 seconds."

Thinking back, I should have said something more along the lines of "I would, but I don't have a guy willing to get naked for me to prove it". Cause that might have led to other things. But it's okay. He then changed the subject but before I left I argued with him and said "You're not straight". He got defensive, but at the same time a little embarrassed. He wouldn't face towards me but instead looked out the window as he was saying "I'm not gay". I found that interesting.

Later last night we had an Awards Ceremony at school that I took him to. Not much interesting happened, except for when I wanted someone to take a picture of he and I he was like "You better not use this to beat off to tonight". I jokingly responded "how did you know?". But he laughed and then posed fore the picture.

I am really enjoying getting this close and comfortable with him. Also, I forgot to mention that earlier this week while filming at one of the other group member's houses, Mikey started texting me while in the same room. I jokingly started acting really sexual in my messages, with things along the lines of "I'm a slave 4 u baby". He kept rejecting me and then said "fuck you". I could tell he was joking by watching his facial expressions when responding. I then sent "I'm gay, remember? Fucking you wouldn't offend me, I'd like it ;)". He then started to laugh, and everyone in the room was wondering what he was laughing at, I enjoyed being the only one who knew. I'm happy that he is now comfortable enough to joke around like that and not be weirded out by me.


Onto other news. I seriously considered creating an email address to talk to you guys with, but honestly I feel like it will be too much to keep up with. Since you can comment anonymously I figured you guys wouldn't mind being open with me since no one can link it back to you. I may at one point make a Formspring account where you can send me anonymous messages and questions and I will respond through here. Let me know if that interests you.

For those of you who read and comment regularly, you have no idea how much it means to me. I nowhere near expected the attention and audience that you guys have brought to me. If there is anything I can do to make this blog more interesting to you please let me know.

Oops, Mikey just IMed me. I gotta go :)


Friday, May 20, 2011

The Good Times Are Killing Me

Sorry I haven't updated in a while. Been really busy with finishing out my senior year. Thank you for all your comments.

So to sum things up, I joined this group of freshman (including Mikey) to make videos together. We've met several times at Mikey's house to film and have been having a blast. I've gotten to really know him, and have went out to eat with just him several times. Even got in bed with him! Okay, maybe it was just to film a scene but hey, I enjoyed sitting on top of his legs while he was under the covers.

We've gotten really comfortable around each other and I like that. A few interesting things have happened worth mentioning though.

1) After the other guys left and I was at his house alone with him, he attempted to teach me a secret handshake. But the thing is, he couldn't remember how it went. So he grabbed my hand and kept trying it over and over until he just stopped to think about it. While still holding my hand. This lasted about 15 seconds. It could have been meaningless, but it sure felt right.

2) This one is smaller, but one day at his house he brushed against my butt 3 times. Could have been by accident, but 3 times...really?

Other than that, his drama class has been performing their class plays. Last night I took Mikey to school and fter the show he and I went out to eat. We were having a good time until he said I was being weird and awkward and seemed mad. To be honest, I felt fine. I made up the excuse that it was because it was my last full day of high school that it left me in a strange mood. But after that, I tried to cheer myself up and seem more peppy for him.

Then there was today...

I picked him up at his house like I did yesterday but when he got in the car he seemed upset. He told me he had gotten in an argument with his mom and couldn't go out to eat afterwards. Other than that, he was silent the rest of the trip. When we got to school he seemed better and it was a lot like yesterday. During the show I texted him about a plan to get his parents to let him go. After the show I met him in the lobby and told him good job and stuff. But he seemed really depressed. Said his performance sucked even though I strongly disagreed. Then his mom came up to him and congratulated him and stuff. Mikey wouldn't look at her and kept giving short answers. She told him he could go out to eat but that didn't seem to change his mood. She said her and his "dad" might go with us but sit at a different table. I said that I thought that was fine, but Mikey gave me a "Really?" look. I figured maybe that wasn't the best thing to say, but I was trying to help the situation by keeping her happy. She asked him for a hug but he gave a puny one and walked away. I felt bad for his mom. I mean, I understand they argued about something but that shouldn't be enough for him to treat her like that.

Anyways, Mikey's other friend wanted me to drop him off at the middle school after the show because he wasn't hungry. Mikey and I were still planning on going out to eat until we got there and he said he was going to. I told him he couldn't cause I told his mom I was taking him home. Then he stepped out of my car, called her, and then shut the door without saying bye and walked away.

I really don't know what's up. But I'm really worried for him, especially since his friend is only going to the event at the middle school to meet up with girls hes had sex with before. Idk, I just don't like it. I told Mikey to text me when he gets home so I'm really hoping he does because I REALLY need to ask "whats up with you?". I have been in this really weird/worried mood since I dropped him off. Something isn't right and I want to get to the bottom of it. I love him too much to see him suffer.

Monday, May 9, 2011

Prom Night and Beyond

Not much time for a long entry tonight, but I wanted to give you guys a little update.

First off, I'd like to thank you guys for your comments and emails. I am working on getting a system set up where I can respond and u can write me personally. I've kind of ran out of gmail accounts (my favorite service to use) because of the stupid phone verification thing. So yeah, I'll work on getting a new email ASAP.

Prom went great, but would have been way more fun with a date. After prom I decided not to go to my friend's afterparty because I had rehearsal in the morning and was really tired.

Lots of progress with Mikey. We have been texting every day since around last Thursday for hours upon hours. Sadly, I'm positive he's straight now. He was in a one week relationship with this girl, but he broke up with her because it was "awkward". I won't get into it because I don't know the details and that's his business, but I will tell you what's been going on between he and I.

A group of his freshmen friends decided to come up with this stupid group and make videos together. They chose me to be their videographer. Anyways, this is a great thing for me because 1) I'll get to hang out with Mikey more often, probably over the summer as well, and 2) I'll get to meet a new group of cute 9th graders. Win-win situation for me lol.

One interesting thing happened Saturday night. I was texting Mikey while at a friend's house. I got a little carried away in our conversation, and admitted to him that I used to have a crush on him. Unfortunately, he took it the wrong way and told me it weirded him out a little. I responded trying to explain myself but he went to bed. CRAP! It ruined my night because I couldn't get over how stupid it was of me to say that.

Anyways, the next morning I woke to a text from him about our group thing, I got to talking and then told him I'd send him a message on Facebook explaining what I said last night. So I did...

So like I said, I felt like I needed to clear up some things from yesterday. I shouldn't have told you to begin with but I was just caught up in the moment of everything.
First off, nothing about you made me think you were gay. Actually, it was more the opposite. Everything pointed to you being straight but I kept holding on to the possibility that you might be (that happens with me a lot).
It all started at the first ______ club meeting of the school year and I saw you. I didn't know your name or anything but I wanted to. After the meeting Mrs. ________ was talking about "all the handsome new guys we have this year" and she pulled out a list of you guys and pointed to your name. Anyways, I didn't really get to know you until you started ushering for shows and I tried to talk to you as much as I could. I think _________ said something about him thinking you were gay (Idk why) so that kind of increased my wanting to get to know you, if that makes sense lol.
But anyways, after we started messaging and talking in person I realized that you probably weren't gay so I moved on from that. Sure, I mean I still liked you for a while but I didn't try to make you like me. Anyways, in the last month or so I haven't thought of you like that at all since we're friends now. So please don't worry about me liking you or whatever, because I don't anymore now that I'm certain you are straight. And I really am happy that you have a girlfriend.
Just wanted to clear some things up, and sorry for weirding you out yesterday. Hopefully this makes you feel better. If not... tell me what I can do that will.

So yeah, after him telling me he had to delete it so his mom wouldn't read it,he seemed okay. The weird thing is, he got a lot more talkative to me than ever before right after that. Today we talked about music, him breaking up with his GF, and "cheese milk grenade to the moon where the elves live" (his words, not mine).

So yeah, thats a quick little update about the Mikey situation. Honestly, I'm happy with how things turned out. Now he knows I liked him so if the magical gay fairy decided to visit him he knows who is already interested haha.

Goodnight, and thanks for reading.