Thursday, April 14, 2011

Mikey Knows All

Wow, it's been 4 days since I last updated and so much has happened!

In trhe past few days I have been texting Mikey very often. And we have discussed some... well you'll see.

Monday: I had rehearsal with the community theater and told Mikey I'd text him when I got home. On the way there my phone started ringing and I saw it was him. I freaked out for a minute and then decided to answer. I could hear a conversation in the background with him and what sounded like a girl. Somehow he must have accidentally called me. Anyways, after rehearsal I told him what happened and he was like "oh... did you hear my conversation?" so I told him no but I heard his and a girl's voice and jokingly said "your girlfriend? ;)". He then said "There weren't any girls" then I responded "boyfriend? lol jk". Perfect moment. He said no and that got us into a long deep discussion about gays. He seemed really interested, especially in who at our school was. Then came the moment of truth...

Mikey: Who else is gay?
Me: Hmm, trying to think of others you would know. Well, I guess you can kind of count me."
Mikey: What do u mean?
Me: Well... it's not something I'm entirely open about (only a few people know). But yea... I hope that doesn't make you think badly of me."
Mikey: So u are gay
Mikey: No I dont at all
Me: Well, I don't like labels. But yea, I'm attracted to guys. Always have been since I was like 12. I've never dated a guy or anything tho.
Mikey: im not labeling you I mean I don't care I don't think differently of u.

Anyways, it went on from there. WOW! I'm sooo happy he doesn't think differently. We went on to talk about what being gay is like. Again, he seemed very interested. But he said 3 times that he wasnt gay and wasn't into guys. Yeah I know, it sucks. But I'm not giving up yet. Just his mere interest in it makes me think he's at least a little sexually curious as well. Who knows...

Tuesday: More texting. This time he was interested in what type of guys I liked. Uhoh.... that's a hard question when you are talking to the person you think is the most beautiful boy you've ever laid eyes on. So I was very broad with my description. Brown or blonde hair, blue or green eyes, nice looking skin, younger. Then he asked "chubby or skinny?" So I said about average (that's what he is). Anyways, I think he caught on that I was describing him so he started sending really short messages so I changed the subject to him. He said he's not much of a ladies man and no girls like him. I told him that couldn't be true, he's very likable. He told me he likes girls with "skinny but not sticks gotta have a donk good size boobs blonde very hot". Yeah, exactly like that lol. He then had to go to bed and I told him if there was anything he wanted to talk about at all he could trust me. He responded "okay, I might text you about something tomorrow". I wasn't sure if he was just speaking in general or something specific.

Wednesday: No text. I was getting nervous. I stalked Facebook for hours (while doing other things) and saw him come on. I brought up his chat box just to see if he went offline or whatever. About 15 min passed and I looked and saw he was typing a message. YAY! He said he left his phone in someone's car. We began to talk about hobbies and stuff and he said he had a similar one to me and I offered to help him sometime. He had to go though, so I told him I'd talk to him tomorrow.

Thursday (Today): I texted him right after school to see if he got his phone back. No response. So at about 8pm tonight I messaged him on Facebook and asked if he got his phone back. He responded "yea it's just off" (first possible clue I didn't pick up on). We talked for a VERY short time before he stopped responding, yet he was still online. So I sent him another message about 20 minutes later and he responded with a "yea" (second hint). I proceeded with asking if he had anyone he liked at the moment. No response....SHIT. He always says bye. Something is wrong, very wrong. Did I do something to make him mad? I don't want this to be over. I really love him, and I don't use that term loosely. PLEASE just let him have been busy.

I have resorted to not messaging, texting, or IMing him first from now on. Let him make the first effort. I don't want to annoy him so much that he stops talking to me all together.

I'll try to update tomorrow of anything (or nothing) happens just so you can know what's up. I really don't want to lose him. Not after all this...


DAMN IT! He did respond to my last message. Even though it was just a "no", it was something. I just sent "Oops, sorry didn't see you responded until now. Oh well, talk to you tomorrow maybe. Text/message/IM me whenever you want." Oh well.... it's my fault. Not his. Goodnight....

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